It’s hard to make friends here. It takes time to get to know Swedes, too much time if you’re only here for a year. Talking to one of American friends who’s also studying here, it’s bizarre how you can have such good interactions with Swedes (they’re polite, maybe even friendly) and yet you go weeks and months without hanging out outside of the situation in which you’ve met them (eg. classes, work, volunteering, sport clubs). There is always a distance that’s maintained- I’ll just say that it takes a long time to get invited for dinner, even if only as a friend. and even if you make the effort, they sometimes recoil like you swore at them or flashed them. Or they think they’re hitting on you since you’re just here for a year and want to get some Swedish ass. Maybe I should wear a sign around my neck that says I have a boyfriend.
I heard that individually, Swedes spend more on home furnishings than any other country. I like that Swedes are generally homebodies and value family and personal time, but I don’t like that their homes are more like very well-decorated asylums instead of glittering socializing hubs. Well, they are boisterous on the weekends in students towns, to be sure… My mother says that maybe Swedes think Americans are superficial partly because we are so friendly to everyone. Yeah, I guess we are, but we wouldn’t say we’re friends with all those people. It’s just a helluv a lot nicer to go about daily life and errands and have the cashier smile. I’ve heard that just smiling can turn on good chemicals in your brain and make you healthier in the long run. But I digress. Maybe the ”Swedish way” creates more meaningful relationships, but in this respect, I like the ”American way.” How do you have any comparisons to decide how caring, thoughtful, or true your friends are if you’ve only ever made ten in your life!? But I guess buffets are a very America thing too. You can say that it’s because it’s a culture of greed, but I prefer to think that it’d because you hunger for a taste of everything and aren’t contented with just a few.
